explode: it's transitive now.

The above link directs to a long post, but it’s worth reading.

If you’re one of these TL;DR types, it’s a girl’s account of the experiences she’s had facing strange men in the street. On numerous occasions she has felt threatened by someone who has followed her, chased her, not taken no for an answer, to the point where she no longer feels safe walking round alone and she deliberately dresses unattractively to try and avoid attention.

While I haven’t had trouble to the same degree as her, I certainly have difficulty gauging how I feel when I get honked at, whistled at, comments made. Flattered? Ashamed? Offended? Yes, on the one hand it’s flattering. But on the other hand it makes me feel almost like a giant walking pair of boobs. It’s embarrassing. I know I have a larger chest (on a small frame) and as a 14/15 year old I used to get inappropriate comments which made me angry (especially inappropriate considering my age at the time). I do get hit on, and while often the other party will back off when I say no, it pisses me off when they keep pestering. On the Tube the other day I was being chatted up by these two 15-year-old boys (or thereabouts), probably as a joke, but it was really annoying me. I was just trying to read my book, but no, they had to ask me all about it, ask me where I was getting off, what I was doing. I told them I was gay, but of course that is always a BIG mistake, because then they start asking “can I watch?”, “do you like going down on your girlfriend”, etc etc. Boys will be boys, but when it’s grown men doing that, you have a problem. But the gay thing is a whole different kettle of fish - we get it, you like lesbians, but it’s really not polite to say things like that or high-five me when I tell you. So just to clear that up: if I’m gay you’re going to continue to ask me inappropriate questions. I see. I don’t really understand what they’re trying to achieve with that. I may not be exclusively interested in women but they’re not doing much for my attraction to men.

Club nights these days seem to be a testing ground for the dodgiest chat-up lines around. I can deal with “Can I buy you a drink?” but putting your arm around me more than once just because I’m next to you at the bar is not going to work. Neither is rubbing your crotch against my back in some misguided attempt at dancing, which I see happening all too often. Perhaps I’m going to the wrong places, but you can see why people call them ‘meat markets’.

Don’t get me wrong, men are lovely creatures, and I get on with them extremely well (most of them, anyway). You’ll find me appreciating a good-looking boy as much as the next person. But the difference is you won’t find me grabbing his arse or honking my horn as I drive past to show my sleazy appreciation. Sure, it’s nice to be told you’re attractive, but not so nice to get yells dripping with sexual intention.

This must be one of the most useful websites ever. I was in Oxfam Books earlier today lamenting the lack of cheap second-hand books around and about, when my good friend Lizzy told me about BookMooch. This is a website where you can list all the books you want to give away alongside all the ones you are searching for. If someone wants one of your books, you pay for the postage and send it off, and then you get points for each book you send. You then use these points to ‘buy’ books that you want, and you don’t pay for anything. So you’re basically swapping books, only paying for the postage of the one you’re sending, and members from overseas are usually happy to wait for Surface Mail to arrive. Everyone’s a winner…